Dead Things I Have Discovered on Our Back Patio

Three lizards
One adult finch
One baby bird, species undetermined
Sundry insects, fished from the pool (Except for one cricket, who turned out to be alive. It proved a worryingly excellent swimmer and eluded capture for at least ten minutes.)

We live in the country. It’s the first time I’ve ever spent any real length of time outside of the suburbs or the, uh, urbs. There have been a few things to get used to, chiefly insects and the array of animals, dead and alive, that pitch up on our backyard.

We’ve made friends with a couple of stray cats. Our favourite is a skinny tabby we’ve named Dine n’ Dash, because she tends to eat whatever we feed her, and then scamper off to safety and shade at the far end of the pool deck.

If I’m feeling lazy, I can just leave a corpse for a day or two. The cats will take it, or the patio ants will strip it clean. It’s a remarkable process, and reminds me of that scene in Lord of War where some Africans tear apart a cargo plane in half an hour.