I just recently discovered this amusing faux travel site, which is apparently the online version of a book. It’s all about the country of Molvania, whose exports include beetroot, spittoons and low-grade heroin. From the useful facts page (in my experience, also true of many actual countries):
In Molvania it is not generally necessary to tip unless of course you want something done. However, as a gesture of goodwill it is common to reward anyone who has been of assistance, whether they’ve driven you, carried your bags or simply performed a minor surgical procedure. Most restaurant and hotel bills include a small service charge (10-15%) as well as a smaller charge (3-5%) for including the first charge.
This reminds me of “Rates of Exchange”, which is a pardody of life in Eastern Europe. It prolly isn’t half as funny for someone who hasn’t spent a few years over here, but that still makes it funny enough to read.
The author also put out a tour guide called “Why Come to Slaka” that sounds a lot like this site. It’s ostensibly written by the Slakan Politburo, and has memorable phrases like, “Our serving women have girded their loins for the purpose of pleasuring you.” Which, if you’ve read the official brochures over here, isn’t that far from how they really do write official English. 🙂
We’ve been to Molvania before!
Dear Oldie
a new book hailed by Bill Bryson as ‘original’ is
heading for a big launch in the UK next month.Do,
please, keep an eye open for the hype.
The work, ‘Molvania’, is a ringer for Malcolm
Bradbury’s in fact original ‘Why Come to Slaka?'(1986)
– a fact not noted by the many hometown log rollers
-apart from one Tasmanian scribe.
QUOTE:
IN DEPTH ( MERCURY Dec 2003 )
This year, at the top for most booksellers came a
comic travel book from the team who brought you
Frontline, The Castle and The Dish. It’s called
Molvania – and like any good seasonal happening it’s
not exactly newly minted.
You see, back in 1986, publishers Martin Secker and
Warburg published a very funny and original satire on
guide books called Why Come to Slaka?. It was written
by the novelist, Malcolm Bradbury.
Bradbury’s book was a beautifully worked-out take on
Middle European Communist Satellite politics, bad
sanitation, secret police, nuclear energy overspills
and, of course, concrete public housing, awful
nationalist songs, faux folk lore and spies! It even
had a potty ode from the ‘national poet’.
Why Come to Slaka? also had a marvellous glossary of
terms which further energised the satirical edge and
wit of the concept. Our favourite was ‘upzippi’ for
escalators.
Molvania is also about a fictional Middle European
country, naturally updated to after the collapse of
the soviet states but otherwise remarkably close in
tone, detail and, well, jokes, to Bradbury’s original.
It even has a fake ode from the national poet!
…But nowhere in Molvania (the book, that is) do we
find any acknowledgement of what is not only the
origin but surely the matrix for this Aussie shadow.
Here’s a bit of the blurb from the publishers Hardie
Grant:
“The funniest book about travel you will ever read: a
travel guide to the fictional European republic
Molvania, birthplace of the polka and whooping cough.
The text and design draw on the standard travel guide
format and include: background information on the
destination, including cultural details, useful
phrases, holidays, and calendar of events;
accommodation and restaurant listings; activities and
excursions…”
Well, all that perfectly describes – give or take a
proper noun or two – Bradbury’s 1986 delight!
Shouldn’t the publishers (Hardie Grant) have done some
basic research? Shouldn’t Aussie reviewers have done
some checking ?
Vero